Case of the Mondays is dead. I’m abandoning it do to lack of interest. I will return to regular postings tomorrow.
Showing posts with label Mondays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mondays. Show all posts
Monday, February 1, 2010
RIP Case of the Mondays Jan 18th-Feb 1st, 2010
Case of the Mondays is dead. I’m abandoning it do to lack of interest. I will return to regular postings tomorrow.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Case of the Mondays Numero Uno: Hipsters.
Welcome to the first (and probably last) installment of Case of the Mondays.
Today’s topic suggested by “Anonymous“ was chosen by default as it was the only topic suggested (Gee guys, nice effort). So without further ado…
HIPSTERS
What can I say about hipsters that hasn’t already been complained by just about everybody? Well first off I should address the Toronto hipsters of Queen St W. These people aren’t even real hipsters. I’ve been to Williamsburg and I’ve seen the genuine articles. It’s kind of like seeing an animal in the wild versus an animal at the zoo. They seem more comfortable and more confident in their own New York environment. The real New York hipsters have a sassy drag queen quality to Toronto’s forced to dress like a woman by my cellmate look.
Is that making any sense? Maybe I’m being too abstract. Maybe I should try another approach. Let’s say that NY Hipsters are hippies. Not a far stretch really (Self-righteous? Check. Freeloading? Check. High all the time? That’s a check). The one thing the NY Hipsters have going for them is that they’re the genuine article. They were at Woodstock, if you catch my drift. That makes the Toronto hipsters just Deadheads or even worse Phisheads! And that’s just sad.
But where did hipsters come from? They’re a fairly new phenomenon as far as pop culture goes. I’m no expert but I do have a theory. I believe that hipsters evolved out of Vice Magazine.
Now I know that Vice has been on a steady decline ever since they moved to New York but in its hey day Vice was like a bible for the young and cool. Their Dos section told girls that if they wanted to give guys “instant boners” all they had to do was pair slim jeans with heels. Meanwhile they were telling guys to drop the metro-sexual tan and faux-hawk, get some tats, grow a beard and pick up a Pabst. There was one article in particular that was a breakdown of what the ultimate Do guy and girl were like. It essentially described (one evolution) of the hipster to a tee. I wish I could find that article online to post it but I do remember that Vice made dolls based on it that they sold in their store.
One can argue that Vice didn’t create hipsters so much as just reported on what they saw on the streets. Even if they didn’t it can’t be denied that Vice had a hand at selling hipsterdom to the masses. That appears to be their final gift to the world before they faded away into unimportance. And maybe Vice had good intentions. I mean girls in tight jeans and heels do look good. Some guys look good with a beard. Pabst Blue ribbon isn’t that bad for a cheap beer. I’m more of a Lucky Lager guy myself but that might have less to do with it being a good beer and more to do with that scene with Brad Pitt in Kalifornia.
By the way have you seen Brad Pitt’s beard lately?
It’s like he’s trying to make himself ugly. Like some kind of experiment.
A lot of people begin things with good intentions. Dr. Oppenheimer, Dr. Frankenstein, and Tom Arnold’s dad are just a few that come to mind. And like these men of science, Vice were forced to watch their creation grow into a twisted monster.
The jeans became skinnier and more garish.
Pssst. Did you know guys wear these?!
The tattoos became more plentiful and meaningless
And the facial hair… have seen what’s going on with that?!
But worst of all is the scarves. Those FUCKING scarves!
It’s all enough to make you want to clean the chunks of Tom Arnold off your pitch fork and round up the townsfolk.
And that’s all I have to say about that.
Today’s topic suggested by “Anonymous“ was chosen by default as it was the only topic suggested (Gee guys, nice effort). So without further ado…
HIPSTERS
What can I say about hipsters that hasn’t already been complained by just about everybody? Well first off I should address the Toronto hipsters of Queen St W. These people aren’t even real hipsters. I’ve been to Williamsburg and I’ve seen the genuine articles. It’s kind of like seeing an animal in the wild versus an animal at the zoo. They seem more comfortable and more confident in their own New York environment. The real New York hipsters have a sassy drag queen quality to Toronto’s forced to dress like a woman by my cellmate look.
Is that making any sense? Maybe I’m being too abstract. Maybe I should try another approach. Let’s say that NY Hipsters are hippies. Not a far stretch really (Self-righteous? Check. Freeloading? Check. High all the time? That’s a check). The one thing the NY Hipsters have going for them is that they’re the genuine article. They were at Woodstock, if you catch my drift. That makes the Toronto hipsters just Deadheads or even worse Phisheads! And that’s just sad.
But where did hipsters come from? They’re a fairly new phenomenon as far as pop culture goes. I’m no expert but I do have a theory. I believe that hipsters evolved out of Vice Magazine.
Now I know that Vice has been on a steady decline ever since they moved to New York but in its hey day Vice was like a bible for the young and cool. Their Dos section told girls that if they wanted to give guys “instant boners” all they had to do was pair slim jeans with heels. Meanwhile they were telling guys to drop the metro-sexual tan and faux-hawk, get some tats, grow a beard and pick up a Pabst. There was one article in particular that was a breakdown of what the ultimate Do guy and girl were like. It essentially described (one evolution) of the hipster to a tee. I wish I could find that article online to post it but I do remember that Vice made dolls based on it that they sold in their store.
One can argue that Vice didn’t create hipsters so much as just reported on what they saw on the streets. Even if they didn’t it can’t be denied that Vice had a hand at selling hipsterdom to the masses. That appears to be their final gift to the world before they faded away into unimportance. And maybe Vice had good intentions. I mean girls in tight jeans and heels do look good. Some guys look good with a beard. Pabst Blue ribbon isn’t that bad for a cheap beer. I’m more of a Lucky Lager guy myself but that might have less to do with it being a good beer and more to do with that scene with Brad Pitt in Kalifornia.
By the way have you seen Brad Pitt’s beard lately?
It’s like he’s trying to make himself ugly. Like some kind of experiment.
A lot of people begin things with good intentions. Dr. Oppenheimer, Dr. Frankenstein, and Tom Arnold’s dad are just a few that come to mind. And like these men of science, Vice were forced to watch their creation grow into a twisted monster.
The jeans became skinnier and more garish.
Pssst. Did you know guys wear these?!
The tattoos became more plentiful and meaningless
And the facial hair… have seen what’s going on with that?!
But worst of all is the scarves. Those FUCKING scarves!
It’s all enough to make you want to clean the chunks of Tom Arnold off your pitch fork and round up the townsfolk.
And that’s all I have to say about that.
Ok. We'll try this one more time. Leave your topic ideas for next week's Case of the Mondays in the comments section below. Capiche?
Monday, January 18, 2010
Turning Me into We!
Sometimes I think my Blog is a little too self-serving.
(I hate buffets. When Gordon Ramsey dies and goes to hell for being such a dick he’s going to have to eat at the Mandarin for all eternity. )
I don’t know how many people out there read The Creep Show but I’d kind of like to find out. Or at least attempt to engage you all a little better. One can never have enough internet weirdos in one’s life.
I’d like The Creep Show to be just that. A show! So I’m going to attempt a little experiment here. Every Monday I’m going to ask YOU the reader to suggest a topic for a blog post. Just rattle it off in the comments section. Anything you’d like me to give my thoughts about. Maybe you want to hear about how much I love Weekend at Bernie’s.
Or how much I like Panda Bears.
Or both!
See there I go again. Telling you what I like. I want to know what you all like. Or don’t like. Or think is stupid (I think Jersey Shore falls into all three of those categories).
Let me know. You can give me one word or as much as you like. If things work out we’ll do this every week and it will be called Case of the Mondays
(I hate buffets. When Gordon Ramsey dies and goes to hell for being such a dick he’s going to have to eat at the Mandarin for all eternity. )
I don’t know how many people out there read The Creep Show but I’d kind of like to find out. Or at least attempt to engage you all a little better. One can never have enough internet weirdos in one’s life.
I’d like The Creep Show to be just that. A show! So I’m going to attempt a little experiment here. Every Monday I’m going to ask YOU the reader to suggest a topic for a blog post. Just rattle it off in the comments section. Anything you’d like me to give my thoughts about. Maybe you want to hear about how much I love Weekend at Bernie’s.
Or how much I like Panda Bears.
Or both!
See there I go again. Telling you what I like. I want to know what you all like. Or don’t like. Or think is stupid (I think Jersey Shore falls into all three of those categories).
Let me know. You can give me one word or as much as you like. If things work out we’ll do this every week and it will be called Case of the Mondays
The chosen one will be posted next Monday.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
