I've got it all figured out.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Ask the Magic Internet a Stupid Question No. 0046.

How do you feel about cops? I know this guy that hates cops. But the funny thing is he has no real reason to. He thinks they’re all corrupt and abuse their power and just hassle people instead of doing their job. But as far as I can tell he’s never been arrested or even really been hassled by the police. Now I can understand hating cops if you’re a criminal or some sort of reprobate. I mean there you are doing your thing, you know breaking into someone’s house or hiding in the waste vault of a women's toilet and next thing you know these guys show up with guns and badges and they man handle you and call you a scum bag and take you away to jail. That probably sucks.

See I bet that guy with the glasses hates that cop.

I can even understand not liking cops if you get hassled by them a lot.

Something tells me he has this problem from time to time.

Even growing up in Burlington I had my brushes with the law. Back then it all stemmed from boredom. Dumb kids are bored enough to do something stupid one night and they get caught. Or bored cops decide to see what these dumb kids are up to even though they’re doing nothing wrong. Here in the city it’s a bit more complicated than that. There’s a lot more crime and a lot more criminals and there’s a lot of different neighborhoods that each have their own problems and views on how the police handle them. Does racial profiling exist? Of course it does. Are there corrupt cops? I’m sure there is. Are there cops that abuse their power? Most definitely. But I think most of the cops out there are honest guys doing their job and earning a paycheck. They’re not zooming around like Vick Mackey stuffing kilos of drug bust cocaine into anonymous duffle bags and blowing the heads off corpses to reuse them in undercover operations.

Hi I’m Corey. I’m here to pick up the body of my dead friend Corey.

Yeeeeah. About that…

I think some regular people don’t like cops because believe that cops get away with a lot because they’re cops. Because they’re part of the club and regular citizens aren’t. Maybe that’s true. Cops do seem to look out for other cops. Do you think a cop has ever given another cop a speeding ticket? And if so what are the repercussions? Does he just pay a fine? Is there further punishment because the cop is on duty? Does it cost him his badge and his gun? I’d kind of like to know that. Let’s put an APB out on the Magic Internet.

Question 46: Has a cop ever issued a speeding ticket to another cop?

Magic Internet Answer: I will happily answer this question because the truth lies in technology. There have been numerous instances in which off-duty officers have been given a citation for speeding or for not obeying traffic laws but I will assume that your question only appeals to officers on duty. Although it has occurred it is very rare for an on duty officer to give another on duty officer a citation. Police officers must work as a unit and must rely on one another in times of distress or great danger. Most police officers will agree that stability in their work environment and good relations with fellow officers far outweighs the justification of upholding the law when it comes to ticketing officers for minor infractions. But that is beginning to change thanks to this:

Short Circuit 3??!! Finally! Steve Guttenburg must be almost out of Citizens on Patrol money. Now there was a good cop.

No you idiot it’s a speeding camera. Today’s speeding cameras are automated and they do not differentiate between citizens and officers of the law. Many police officers are now being caught on camera speeding and receive a ticket in the mail. If the officer wishes to dispute the ticket he must prove that his speeding was in the line of duty and justified. Do you not just love technology Johnny?

Hmm. And I thought those speed cameras were just cash grab machines. Maybe they do serve a further purpose in uniting the police and the community together.

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